I stil have shoe covers and scrubs on. Sometimes I just need a minute to process all the events that occurred during my twelve hour shift. Was this the worst night ever? No. But it sucked a little bit. Busy with lots of little CF’s throughout the night.
Inevitably, as a nurse, I see people die. It’s one of those crappy facts of life. People die. When people die in my unit, they are tiny little people. Occasionally, it’s an adult. To an extent, you get a little numb to it. I do, anyway. A coping mechanism, of sorts. When people think of labor and delivery, they tend to think of welcoming new life, but it’s not always a happy place.
No one died last night, but someone came close and may yet still not make it. It’s mornings like these, after a long, busy and draining night that I find myself like this, still in my dirty scrubs, evidence of time spent in the OR on my person, in need of a few minutes to process the nights events.
I apologize for a downer of a post. I just needed a space to reflect on last night. Now, to clean up and head to bed. Tonight’s pancake night at the mothership. We could all use pancakes after last night.